Home  »  Categories  »  All About Orgasms  »  Five Months of Faking

All About Orgasms

Five Months of Faking

"The other day my girlfriend told me (in these words), 'You have not been satisfying me sexually, I have been faking it for the last five months.' I am furious at her for not telling me this five months ago, and also because of the way she phrased her opening line. My friends think I should break up with her but I still love her.

I am also afraid to instigate any sexual activity now, so we have hardly touched each other in the past two weeks. She later claimed the faked orgasms were because of guilt from us not being married, but she has had real orgasms in the past."


Kim Martyn:
I can't blame you for being angry at the way your girlfriend told you about her faking it; it sucked. If only she'd started with 'I'm feeling frustrated, and this is hard to say but...'. Don't, however, be too hard on her for not telling you earlier. It's a tricky cycle to break out of. You fake it, hoping that each time will be the last, and then you know you're going to hurt your guy when you finally fess up. LOTS of women never tell the guy!

So, what to do now. Talk. Not with your friends, with her. Tell her how you feel. Write it down if you need to. Tell her what you hope for. Ask her how she feels, what she hopes for with you. Agree not to have intercourse for awhile, say a month. That takes the pressure off both of you. Maybe she does need to be engaged or married to feel comfortable, people do change. When and if you start again take your time, ask her to show you what she likes. It will be fun, I promise!

If you two make it through this, you'll be much more closer. Then your friends can come to you for tips on how to be a good lover!


Other questions in this category: